I RATE ADS

sjbooher: I cringe as these guys talk. There are several ads in this series, all with this trio trying to be funny. Mission failed, in my opinion. I’m sure some people laugh at them, though, so I cannot rule them out entirely. On the positive side, I have never heard of this cereal before, and the description in these ads whets the old’ palette, so they did a good job there. C+.

jtherkal: To put together an entertaining 30-second commercial that spends all 30 seconds talking about the product is a tough task. Here we have spots where people talk about the Raisin Bran Crunch and its benefits for the duration. It’s all raisin bran crunch all the time. The writing is pretty good (”Hmmm, maybe you haven’t heard it, two scroops of crunch…nooo, two scoops of raisins.”), but they failed by trying to make it “extra” funny. The banter between the guy who likes crunch and the guy who likes raisins is a good premise for the campaign. Then they throw in that third little elf-man and try to have him be the punchline. He ruins it for me. But overall, success. “As long as Ms. Flake and Mr. Granola are coming to crunch town, it’s a great time.” A-.

sjbooher: These have been airing quite a long time now, but recently re-registered on my radar due to being run incessantly during Dodgers broadcasts. Over the years I have both hated and loved these spots, but now I’m going to go with love. They are a different take on the now famous Chuck Norris facts, and while I don’t like every single joke, I love the idea. I could do Chuck Norris facts (I like applying them to Ryan Braun, however) all night long if given a willing audience. The product is also well featured, and since these ads are pretty much the only reason I would ever drink this crap beer, they do their job well. A.

jtherkal: I don’t recall seeing this, which makes me one of the saddest men in the world. Perhaps it’s because I don’t live close enough to Mexico, and the media team on Dos Equis figures the only time you would drink Dos Equis is in Mexico. Regardless, “Stay thirsty, my friends,” when delivered by the most interesting man in the world is a phenomenal line. The film footage and the scripts are close to perfect. The potential for this to be a killer campaign is only hampered by the fact that it’s Dos Equis, which apparently has very limited resources. I would watch many more commercials like this and possibly even drink a Dos Equis in its honor. Then while leaving the bar where I had consumed said Dos Equis, say to many people, “Stay thirsty, my friends.” A-.

sjbooher: Hilarious. I love this on every comedic level. My favorite part is when Kanye says, “That was awesome”. This viral campaign also has an accompanying website, where the shenanigans continue. I love the rollover trick with the bald white guy. Of course, though, I have to complain about the advertising portion of this. It’s for Absolut, but for what, exactly? And is that infomercial going to air on TV? Will anyone know about this? How far are they going to take it? Until some of those questions are answered, I’ll go with B-.

jtherkal: Part of me wants to not like it, but I can’t help it. Pretty great. I think even though the initial branding of Absolut isn’t clear, the after-effect is going to be strong. People will notice this, be a part of it, and it should create a buzz for Absolut. I love the part when he asks, “How many times have you told yourself, I feel famous and powerful on the inside, but nobody sees it that way on the outside” and the answer “300 TIMES!” flashes on the screen. Also, the Be Kanye quiz on the website–where you can’t even answer any questions–is good. There is part of me that wonders, what happened to the famous, iconic Absolut advertising? But most of me just likes it. A-.

In anticipation of the latest Batman movie, a couple companies (at least) have partnered with the makers of the movie for co-branded ads.

Comcast Triple Play:

sjbooher: I’ve actually seen this one on tv. Clever. “Some Joker blew up the mini-van.” Get it? The idea of a regular family living in Gotham City is funny, but the writers mailed this one in. Seems like they could have made this funnier and even more enjoyable. B-.

jtherkal: I have to agree. A normal family in Gotham City is fertile ground for comedy, but they didn’t quite nail it here. The fear toxin and the idea that $99 Comcast makes Gotham paradise is sort of funny. Well, maybe not the fear toxin. C+.

Domino’s Pizza:

sjbooher: I like this one more. Hahahahaha. The Joker owes her a car. What a fool he is… doesn’t he want his minions fed? Let the delivery lady be! They could have used a few more pizza shots, though. Nothing sells pizza better than pictures of pizza. A-.

jtherkal: I don’t really care for this commercial. I understand the goons’ motivation–pizza is delicious–but where is Batman? Why wouldn’t they just kill her when she got to the door? The Joker don’t owe nobody no car, bitch! I guess this doesn’t have to be logical, but I still don’t like it. Partially because Domino’s pizza is the worst pizza. D+.

On a related note, watch and enjoy:

jtherkal: First, let me say that I’m a huge fan of The Hills. I know it’s for idiots and that the people on it are superficial fame seekers, but aren’t we all just a little bit like that? I mean, look at us, we’re writing some stupid blog about ads. Why? To get famous, of course. And for fun. So on to the ad. I’m predisposed to like it, because I love Lauren and I think Brody is pretty cool (except for this). Who better to advertise a phone whose RDB is that you can see yourself in it than people who care almost entirely about themselves? Pretty smart. Then, throw in a little Warrant and you have a winner! This ad had to be written by someone my age, because Warrant had approximately a two year lifespan, and you had to be a 13-year old with a mullet and spandex to really like them–which I was. This commercial is like a sweet piece of Cherry Pie. A-.

sjbooher: Welcome to IRateAds.com, the bootleg edition! How terrible is the video on this one? All we need to make it completely wack is some guy’s head popping in front of the camera… anyway, as surprising as it may be for a teen drama addict such as myself, I’ve managed to avoid the Hills diaspora. I do recognize them, but have no preconceived notions about them. That being said, this would be a good ad if Joe Schmoe and Lucy Loser were starring in it. It’s clever, culturally relevant, etc., etc. A, byatches.

jtherkal: I’ve now seen this one enough to officially have the opinion that there’s something catchy about the music, but nothing that really makes me want the pants. It makes me think white people love San Francisco and that Dockers are for squares. Which I suppose is their target market. Mission sort of accomplished. In related news, for about seven years I wore nothing but baggy khakis and t-shirts. B-.

sjbooher: I love this commercial because of this, Gang Starr’s “Check The Technique”. Another musical commercial win. When this ad comes on, there is a good chance you will find me dancing wildly throughout my apartment. Awesome. Also, Dockers tries to make one thing very clear: “If it ain’t white, it ain’t right.” Can’t fault them for pinpointing a market, and going after it, I guess. I will say that the music and visuals make these people seem “cooler” than I normally would think they were. Success. A-.

jtherkal: Not long ago we rated a Dove shampoo ad, and we rated it poorly. Most advertising targeting females, especially in the beauty industry, is entirely forgettable. This one is not. It delivers the message in a funny, memorable way. Someone out there understands that girls are smart enough to get jokes and that when people laugh, they remember. This may suffer from a slight case of “forget what product it’s for,” but overall I think we’ll start seeing more and more ads that target girls in this way. In my opinion, it’s smart. A-.

sjbooher: Hahahahahahahaha. Very funny, like TBS! “No she did not just do the crazy head twirl, girlfriend! Hell-to-the-naw!” Everything he just said, but downgraded a little more because of the lack of product focus. B.

sjbooher: Remember how I mentioned that the dialog in the NBA split-head ads seemed scripted and forced? This is the exact opposite. Did MJ write this script while smoking a stogie and playing cards at the 19th Hole? I wouldn’t put it past him… but probably not. Does it sound like it could be an inspirational, from the heart speech he might give at the end of some camp for high schoolers? Definitely. Jordan Brand gets it right over and over again. They convey an image of superiority… of greatness… that you just want to be a part of. A+.

jtherkal: It’s hard to go wrong when Jordan is the voice of your brand. And your brand is actually his brand. He’s a proven winner and you instantly associate greatness with the product (except for Hanes, which somehow has managed to develop a “silly underwear” personality with Jordan and Cuba). It’s a good reminder that behind every great player is determination and drive and hard work. I sort of understand using the imagery they used, with no footage of him actually playing, but couldn’t they have found some training footage? Shooting free throws after hours in the gym? Anything? We want to see Jordan in action. A-.

jtherkal: Advertising today is going in new and strange directions. Dr. Pepper certainly recognizes the role YouTube is going to play in it all. Until a few weeks ago, I had never heard of Tay Zonday, but a million other people had. Just a guy making a song. For some reason or another, mostly because it’s ridiculous, millions (over 20 million views!) of people watched his video. So what does Diet Cherry Cholocolate Dr. Pepper do? Give him some production dollars and put a video on youtube. Was it a waste of money? Over four million views say no. He moves away from the mic so he can breathe! The only bad thing I have to say about this is the ending. They didn’t need anything more than the bottle being splashed. That terrible cherry chocolate logo, which was apparently created by someone vomiting design elements into a blender, then blending it and pouring it into a “terrible logo” mold, was unnecessary. A-.

And need I mention the strange awfulness of “Diet Cherry Chocolate Dr. Pepper”? I can’t even begin to fathom what that tastes like.

sjbooher: Tay is awesome, “Chocolate Rain” is above and beyond awesome, and the idea of this video is absolutely brilliant. While I cannot say I think the end product is perfect — I would have wanted the product featured a little more prominently and told Mista Johnson he can be in “the next one” — it does not matter. Millions of views are getting the brand out there. B-.

sjbooher: Awesome. A simple and clever idea, executed brilliantly. Coke seems to generally do a good job of showcasing the beverage itself in their ads. As a Coke fan, I often find myself salivating after seeing their spots, and this one is no different. A+.

jtherkal: Nice and simple. An ice cold fountain Coca-Cola classic is refreshing and delicious–this does a perfect job reminding us. The term sip-stealing could find its way into popular usage; I know I’ll use it next time I’m stealing sips. But the other line “not a felony in all 50 states” is kind of dumb. A-.